This week was so rough. It seemed like everything went wrong, although now I realize that it certainly could have been much worse. Still, it was a tough week for me. But I prayed a lot. And you know what? Those prayers were answered in ways that I couldn't have imagined, and for the most part, everything ended up working out. It was a hard few days, but it served as an excellent reminder that I'm not in control, and I need to be more faithful and trusting.

One thing that did make me happy, though, was walking out on my balcony and seeing how beautiful this tree is right now! I don't know how I didn't notice it until just yesterday. (And I didn't edit that picture at all... it's really that bright!)

Life is hard.

But it sure is beautiful.
{photo by Naomi}

Weekend!

I'm trying to be a good person. Really.

I am always nice to old people. I attempt to care about what's on the news. I take my vitamins when I remember to. I have (almost) managed to control my temper.

But this week I ate a dozen cupcakes all by myself (at least they were tiny!). I skipped three days at the gym. I stayed up all night, every night, and as a result, I was really grouchy. I ate fast food every day. I did poorly on two tests at school.

Luckily I only have one obligation this weekend: writing an article that I'm convinced is never going to come together. I plan on spending the rest of it visiting with my family who will be in town, taking long naps, watching my little sisters perform as Oompa Loompas in Willy Wonka, and reading the giant stack of magazines that my bedroom floor has accumulated.

What do you do on the day your love leaves for a month?

You crawl back into bed, pull the covers over your head, & skip your class to sleep for hours because you are cold, sad, & sleepy. When you finally wake up, you immediately start shopping for plane tickets to go see him in a few weeks. Then you leave the house only to go get a gigantic cup of iced coffee which you drink while reading a stack of magazines on the couch. You fill the living room with flowers so you won't be sad every time you walk in the front door. You paint your nails, go to the gym, clean the kitchen. You wash, dry, fold & put away every piece of laundry in the house. You drive aimlessly, go to your parents' house twice, eat three cupcakes.

That's what. And that's only half of it.

There are 733 miles, 4 states, & roughly 30 days between us. I am not a fan of business trips. Not at all.

*photo via weheartit

count your blessings.

i've been in a funk. its just been one of those months
when everything seems to be going all wrong.

i didn't get the grades i wanted.
(it's odd that the classes i completely blew off,
i got a's in,
and the ones in which i worked my little tail off,
i got quite the opposite of an a)
i've been unbelievably busy.
i've not worn real clothes in weeks,
and i've never been one to go out in sweats.
i've lived in this apartment for over a month,
and it is still not completely unpacked nor clean.
i've parted ways with one person in particular.
someone who i swore would be in my life forever..
i've been grumpy. sad. worn out. stressed.
i could keep going, but i think you get the point.

i've been having a hard time, and it's been a constant struggle
to be aware of all the wonderful things present all around me.
i've been absurdly blessed, far beyond what i deserve.
and here are just a few things i'm so happy to have in my life:

my crazy, huge, lovely family, especially momma and those beautiful girls called my sisters. my hilarious, loud, supportive friends. this boy named richard; he is perfect. my health. my apartment. a closet full of clothes and shoes and purses. books and movies and records and iphone and ipod. faith. cupcakes! having a strong sense of what i want to do with my future. beautiful memories. forgiveness. nights that are spent with coffee, music, and collage making. trips to alabama to see spice. meaningful phone calls and cards and words. christmas. & really, just my life.


(pssst! i have a new hair color. it was supposed to turn out dark brown, but it is totally BLACK.)

i adore these beautiful little sisters. you can call them candlyfloss and babycakes.

cold/FUN day of riding roller coasters.

sisters at build-a-bear. we visit this place far too often.

blah

I've been in a funk for a little more than a week now, and I'm hoping my trip to the Bahamas in three weeks will cure it. I don't know what's wrong with me; my heart just isn't in a lot of the things I'm doing, and I feel like I need a very long break. Things are also so confusing and at a standstill, and it's put a major damper on my life.

Today I spent five hours in the park, and then on top of a parking deck watching the sunset. I spent six hours on the phone which is definitely a record for me. I'm going to make a list of the simple things that make me happy, and then I'm going to read magazines and call up some friends and do something crafty.

jeudi

This week has been just as rough as the weekend was good. I've been so stressed out/worried/upset about school, money, deadlines for the magazine I work for, and of course, boys. I've even managed to make myself sick with all the stress and worrying. Here's to hoping the rest of the week starts looking up.

On a happier note, I bought this dress from Forever 21 that I have been wanting so badly. I can't wait to wear it with tights and flats this weekend. I'm going home tomorrow, and I honestly couldn't be happier. It'll be a much needed break after all this mess. Ashley (who bought a motorcycle yesterday!) may come with me, which would make it even more fun! I plan on spending the entire weekend jumping on the trampoline and playing silly games with my little sisters. I absolutely cannot wait.